The absent minded professor strikes again

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

My mother used to say to me, Je-sus Christ! You would forget your head if it wasn't attached. I would get really mad but I inside I thought, Who am I kidding? She's right.

I'm constantly misplacing things and I'm extremely forgetful. Every night before I go to sleep, I check that all the doors and windows are locked. Must be sure we're safe!

Well, I did it again. This time I left my keys in my front door all night, where anyone can see them as they're driving by because the door is nicely illuminated by my solar lights.

I must have a secret desire to be robbed of house and home and/or killed in my sleep.


  1. Glad you made it through the night. Apparently you presented no challenge to the robber/serial killer and he moved on.

  2. I know exactly where you're comin' from.

    Our apartment's front door opens into a stairway and there is a seperate door to our porch balcony. In the summer we open both doors for a breeze.

    I can not tell you the numbers of times we've either gone to bed with both doors wide open or how many times I've gone out to run errands and left them open.

    So far, fingers crossed no one has 'wandered' through our apartment.

  3. That's funny....but not safe! I am forgetful too, but safety is a must! My daughter was a waitress and sometimes she didn't get home until 4 in the morning. One of these mornings she came in tired and plopped on the couch and fell asleep (forgetting to lock the door). She woke up a 5:30 to her husband in the shower getting ready for work, she moved from the couch to the bed. Her husband heard the front door open and then could tell someone was standing in the bathroom on the other side of the shower curtain, he thought it was my daughter. He opened the curtain to find a man standing there and the man took off out the door. My son-in-law thought the man was drunk and wandered in the wrong house....they lived in a neighborhood where all the houses looked the same. It turned out the guy went a block over and raped a woman who was sleeping on her couch.....the guy had just gotten out of prison the week before after serving time for rape. So ya never know....please be careful! They caught the guy because my son-in-law got a good look at him and was able to give the police a good description of him, thank God!

  4. There was a time in my life I was doing that on a regular basis. It got to the point if I couldn't find my keyes I would go look in the front door. Luckiy we were living in a very safe neighborhood.

    I blame it on having two very small children at the time and my brains were fried.

  5. This is so funny, because I use to do this ALL THE TIME in one of my apartments when I lived in Florida.

    However, thank god I haven't done it in a long time.

    (now watch me to it tonight!) least you have Bern to bark in case someone broke in....

    ...WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!

  6. I once left the house with the door wide open. I just opened it, walked out and went to work. My neighbor called me on my cell a few hours later to tell me I was a jackass. How do we DO shit like this? One of my greatest accomplishments of my life is NOT leaving my daughter somewhere when she was a baby. Everyone said it would happen...

  7. I normally don't do things like that, but about a month ago, out of the blue, I went into a store and left my car door open - not unlocked, OPEN - on TWO SEPARATE OCCASIONS! Never did it before, never did it since, but twice in one week.

    Go figure.

  8. You're forgetful because you've got too many balls in the air, you're of higher than average intelligence and menial tasks like losing keys or finding your missiing cordless phone in fridge (oh, wait-that was me) just happen because you're meant for GREATER things. Always thinking 2-steps ahead, my lady...

  9. I locked myself OUT of the house a few weeks ago when I had an 8:30 work appointment. Thankfully, I don't lock the deadbolt, so I was able to break into my own house with a credit card.

  10. OMG..I have done this before....but this past Monday, I let the dogs in from the balcony and left my back door wide open all day. When I came home from work, I wondered, why do I feel a breeze in here? Thank God, I live on the second floor. That night, I found my toothpaste in the frige...I have no idea how it got there.

  11. That's hilarious. I remember the first post.

  12. @KC, Right. Like taking candy from a baby. Where's the fun in that?

    @Frannie, That sounds nice and airy. I would be tempted to leave it open, too. Just set a booby trap in front of your door.

    @Kris, Oh my! What a story. Thank God they caught the guy.

    @Christina, I know. I guess this is a testament to the safety of my neighborhood, too!

    @Ron, Are you kidding? My Dad came in last week to let a contractor look at my roof and he said Bernie never even came downstairs to see who was in the house. Great watchdog I have!

  13. @Vanessa, How funny that your neighbor called you that! At least it's good to have people like that who look after your house. Congrats on not losing your daughter!

  14. @Chris, How do you leave the whole door open?? Was that the day you were hit in the head with a pie or two?

    @Kathryn, You're probably right. I am always thinking about what I need to do tomorrow before I go to bed. Phone in the fridge? Really? :-)

    @Judge, Well that's good that you were able to break in so easily, right??

  15. @Funny Girl, How DO we do these things? Toothpaste in the fridge. You got me on that one. Never done that!

    @Carlos, Yep. Money well invested in that ADT system.

  16. I left my purse in the warehouse bathroom at work for over four hours, with delivery guys coming and going. I was freaking out when it was time to go home because a) my car and my house keys were in there, and b) my tenant's monthly rent (in cash!) was in my wallet.

    I've never left the toothpaste in the fridge but I almost poured milk into the coffee jar after a particularly late night and early morning.

  17. Scribe, Wow and no one stole any of it? I always dream that I've left my purse somewhere and when I come back my wallet is empty.

  18. I've had neighbors do that. I just knock and point.

    I'm a bit too paranoid to actually leave them in the door. I check my pockets and the designated "drop keys here when I walk in the house" spot often. Too often, really. But, hey, I'm safe!

  19. Bran da flake, What a nice neighbor you are!

    That's what's so funny (??), I'm totally paranoid. In fact, that night, I heard these kids outside at midnight and even got out of bed to look. Must have a guardian angel!


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