Monday Morning Chrissy

Monday, January 14, 2013

This seemed appropriate to add to my car window.

Secondhand Sunday

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Sundays are my Secondhand day. I'm basically too lazy to think of anything new to say so I re-post a "vintage" entry.

If you aren't in the mood for repeats, please feel free to change the channel.

"Am I smarter than a first grader?"

Original Post Date, April 10, 2012

I think I’m getting dumber as I age. Or is it, more dumb? Either way, I just don’t feel as mentally sharp as I used to. I think I smell worse, too, but that’s another discussion.

I have always prided myself on being able to think on my feet and complete tasks with both speed and accuracy. Maybe it’s just an inevitable consequence of aging, but I feel like I’m thinking slower than before. I’m not quite to the “riding the short bus” level of slowness but I won’t be applying for “Jeopardy” any time soon, either.
I was off last Monday, lying on my couch in the middle of the afternoon, watching TV. There was something about people living on disability and so I googled “Disability for mental illness” thinking it might be a good career move for my decreasing intelligence.

I reviewed the eligibility categories:

Schizophrenia – I’m pretty sure I don’t have this but I do have Quadrophenia by The Who

Mental retardation - I had this once when I dated a guy that I was pretty sure had killed his last girlfriend and buried her in the backyard. It passed when we broke up.

Anxiety - Thank you, Prozac.

Depression - See above.

Substance abuse disorders - I’m working on this one as I type.

I fell asleep in the middle of filling out the application and I woke to a commercial talking about improving my brain.
It was touting the benefits of a website called Lumosity. This cognitive training website was developed by neuroscientists to help improve your mental abilities. I was intrigued and bored enough to give it a look-see.

The first thing I always want to know is how much something costs. Lumosity offers a three day trial, which only after you sign up, allows you to access the pricing scale. I’ll share it with you here since I signed up. C’mon, you know I’m a sucker for FREE:

1 month $14.95

Yearly $6.70/month, billed in one installment of $80.40.

Two years $4.49/month, billed in one installment of $107.76

Or Lifetime for $299.95 which would be a good deal, if we all weren’t all going to be dead on December 21, 2012 as the Mayan calendar professes.

You start by answering some simple questions about memory, attention, speed, flexibility and problem solving. The allows Lumosity to create a personalized training program just for you. I had fun with the 3 day trial so I decided to sign up for a month.

There's a page called The Science behind Lumosity where they talk about all the scientific studies that have been done showing how cognitive training extends beyond the actual game itself into real life. I think everyone can draw their own conclusions.

I, for one, think the results have been amazing. I mean, just the other day I......wait, what was I talking about?

If your friends acted like pets

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

I think everyone with a dog or cat will appreciate this one!

Monday Morning Dino

Monday, January 7, 2013

Good grief! Will you turn up the heat, please?

Secondhand Sunday

Sunday, January 6, 2013

Sundays are my Secondhand day. I'm basically too lazy to think of anything new to say so I re-post a "vintage" entry.

If you aren't in the mood for repeats, please feel free to change the channel.

"Go ahead, make my day."

Original Post Date, January 17, 2012

Okay, so I had my LAST date on Saturday. And not in a good “my last date…my last kiss cuz this is the one” kinda way. I’m just DONE.

We’ve discussed how shallow I am and how that usually ends up biting me in the ass when the pretty boys end up being jerks. I decided to go out with a really nice, educated, articulate, successful financial planner that really wasn’t my physical “type” but since chemistry can be so elusive anyway, I decided to give it a shot. He was 50, divorced with three young kids (again, I ask the question…where were these guys when I wanted kids 10 years ago??)

We decided to meet at a trendy pub on Saturday for lunch. I was anxious to check it out since I had never been there before and some friends said it was fun. Well, he got there before me and texted that it wasn’t open for lunch but that he would wait in the parking lot for me and we could go somewhere else. I pulled up to see a silver haired guy sitting in a ginormous SUV, tapping away on his iPhone.

He suggested that we head down the road to another bar and I got in his car. (I know. Stupid move. But I figured if anything happened to me, he could easily be found by all information I had gathered through my pre-date investigation of him).

He was nice but I didn’t really feel a connection which was probably best when he told me about his “still really angry” ex-wife who was a surgeon and had left him for a resident, only to have that guy leave her, too. Isn’t that how it always is? It sounded like he had way too much drama in his life and that he was looking for something more serious than I was anyway. It seems like all the men I meet are looking for their next wife and they don’t understand a woman who wants to casually date. By the end of lunch, he was telling me to “not take it personally, but you aren’t ready to date.”

Um, okay, Dr. Drew.

What the hell??

We had an interesting debate on that one and he asked me if I was a serial dater?? Wha??

We had actually made plans to do something after lunch but it was obvious to both of us that this date was over. I feel like I’m now acting like all the men I dated when I was in my 20’s and the guys are me. “Don’t you realize that I’m the best thing since sliced bread?”, they implore.

Driving back to my car, we had this conversation:

Ginormous SUV guy: “You know it was really…um…brave of you to get in a car with someone you don’t know.”

I gazed at him wistfully, “Yeah…maybe….”

“No, really. I mean, you don’t even know me.”

I turned to him and smiled, “It’s okay. I have a gun in my purse.”

He started to laugh but then I saw the look of fear and uncertainty flash across his face.

Go ahead, buddy, call me a serial dater again.

Can you recommend a movie, God?

Thursday, January 3, 2013

A friend posted a positive review of a movie called The Letter Writer on Facebook. She said there weren’t any well known actors in it but that she had come across it on Netflix and loved it. Curious, I decided to Google it so I could get some info about it and maybe watch a preview. I scrolled down the search results and saw that it was listed on a site about Christian videos.
I scanned their list of movies, looking for The Letter Writer.
The Greatest Miracle
God’s Mighty Servant
The Flowers of St. Francis
 Finding Fatima
Anchorman 2
Anyway, here's the preview. It looks pretty good. I originally found it on GodTube but I couldn't figure out how to embed it here.
Yes, GodTube. I can't make this stuff up.

Warm out there today, huh?

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

I was just reading a list of the best or worst cities for this or that. It listed as one of the enviable amenities, warm weather. I never really thought of the weather as being an “amenity”. When I hear the word amenity, I think of hotel amenities, like a hair dryer or an ice machine. I’ve never seen a hotel website say “sunny weather included at no extra charge”.
Although, now that I say that, it’s kinda cute, isn’t it? Hey! Maybe I can sell the idea to Disney World. Don’t you dare! I thought of it first.
But to say that a city is more enviable because of warm weather makes no sense. At one time or another, we all have warm weather. I suppose the term warm is relative, too, because warm for Cleveland could be the mid 80’s while warm for Antarctica could be the 40’s. Why else would people in cold climates wear shorts when the temp hits 50 and people in warm climates put on a winter coat?
How about just saying“agreeable atmospheric conditions” and then people can interpret that however they see fit?
And why is warm better anyway? You can’t ski when it’s warm. Or build a snowman. Or go ice skating. Or get your tongue stuck to a pole. Or lose a toe to frostbite. And c'mon, everyone knows that sandals are overrated. They have no arch support, for God's sake.
My point is, the grass isn’t always greener, even when it’s greener…

Prozac, anyone?

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

In the last year, I've indulged in a lot of self-destructive behavior.

No, no...nothing fun like meaningless sex.

Mostly booze and food. Mostly food, really. It's always been my drug of choice, but in the last year it's gotten the best of me. I felt like I had no control over my life or career so what was the point in eating healthy? It was one the only thing that made me feel comforted, but the satisfaction was fleeting, and was always followed by self disgust.

When I look back at how I looked in my 20's and even 30's, I've always figured that I had a good metabolism but when I dissect it, I was eating like a thin person. My basic meals were a protein and a veggie, some fruit as a snack and then a daily indulgence of chocolate. This was coupled with some pretty intense working out, too. So, no I wasn't just "lucky", I was dedicated. Dedicated to looking and feeling good.

I haven't really cared about either one in a while. I have multiple food allergies, so I always avoided anything that was on my "no" list. I wouldn't even cheat once. In the past year, I sought out the things that made me feel the worst because then I could just sleep it away. And then I could forget about how miserable I was. My "naps" on the weekend? No shorter than 5 hours.

I knew I had hit rock bottom when I started avoiding get togethers with friends because of being embarassed by how I look. Me! Embarassed by how I look? And to not want my picture taken? When, that was just unheard of.

But that was back in 2012 and this is a new start. I promise to not be all wishy washy depressing. I just have to detox all the crap out of my system so I can find the fun again.

Who's with me??

Blogger Template created by Just Blog It