Secondhand Sunday

Sunday, February 7, 2010

I'm basically too lazy to think of anything new to say so I'm re-posting a "vintage" entry.

If you aren't in the mood for repeats, please feel free to change the channel.


"I'M SORRY, I FORGOT"

Original Post Date, May 4, 2009

If I invite you over to watch a movie at my house, I'll likely get up to go into the kitchen to make popcorn and I'll ask you what you would like to drink.

"Diet Coke, please", you say, and I'll stroll off to the kitchen to start popping and pouring.

A little while later, final kernel popped, I'll come back into the living room. I'll place the popcorn on the coffee table but I won't give you your Diet Coke. Not because I'm a rude hostess or I just drank the last one myself. I won't give it to you because I've forgotten that I asked you if you wanted one.

I'm kind of like the Absent Minded Professor, only not that smart. Just so highly engrossed in my own world that I forget things almost after they've been told to me.

I can remember events from the first grade but I can't remember who I was supposed to follow up with after hanging up with my supervisor, who just told me who to follow up with. I've fooled people into thinking that I'm really efficient and complete tasks as soon as I'm given them. Not so. I'll just forget them if I wait an hour to get started.

If I stop at a gas station to get directions and it involves more than two turns in opposite directions, I'll just reiterate the first instruction, Okay, so I'll turn left out of this driveway and go for 2 miles, right? Then I'll stop at the next gas station I come to and ask the same question. Oh sure, I could write directions down, but my handwriting is so atrocious, even I can't read it.

I also lose things. Well, sometimes I just misplace them but they generally don't turn up until after I've already replaced them. I have 7 pairs of tweezers, 30 emery boards, 5 calculators and 3 hammers. I would only have 1 of each if I could have remembered where I put the first one.

I have three doors into my house: the front door, the side door and the door off the deck. My nightime ritual involves making sure that each door is locked and deadbolted. I check the windows and turn the backyard light on to make sure there isn't anyone lurking anywhere.

This morning, I woke up and was going to take Bernie for her walk. And I looked everywhere for my keys. I usually throw them somewhere when I walk in the door. They weren't on the hall table or the bookcase or the mantel or the dining room table or God forbid, the key hook.



This would be improper use of a security system.

9 comments

  1. The fact that the other morning I looked for my keys and wallet in my usual spot on the counter, missing, backtracked to my truck outside, and sitting on the hood was my keys and wallet with the window on the truck rolled down!!!! All that was missing was the rain. sigh

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  2. Hey Chrissy! Sadly, this is all too familar to me. I've lost track of the number of times I've wandered downstairs to do something, only to stand in the kitchen, totally perplexed. If you find yourself in front of an open fridge door with a screwdriver in your hand, wondering "and just what am I doing?" then it's time for fuzz therapy with Bernie. Indigo

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  3. I am right there with you. Sometimes I forget what I'm gonna say in mid ...... Hmmm .... Just lost it again. Your writing is the best Chrissy. Really enjoying your blog.

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  4. I think this could be classified as message overload or something! As a waitress I do this ALL the time, I'll ask a table what they want to drink and the moment I walk away I forget! The best way for me to remember is to literally retrace my steps but walk backward and it really honest to god works! Just try it I dare you!

    my aunt one time couldn't find her keys when she was ready to leave for work, guess where she found them? In the ignition and the car was still running! Dumbass!

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  5. AHHH!! I've done the key thing in the door before. Thank goodness all of the axe murderers were too stupid to notice.

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  6. Ahhhhh...... What was going to say? Sheesh

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  7. @R. Jacob,
    Okay, you take the cake! Keys AND wallet on the hood? You must live in a very safe neighborhood.

    @IndigoWrath,
    Dare we admit it's age?

    @Joel Momberg,
    LOL! Thanks, Joel.

    @Brndoutw8ress.
    Okay, I've done the retrace my steps but I'll have to try it backwards!

    Geez, did you aunt have any gas left??

    @Candice,
    Funny!

    @Simply Suthern,
    I feel your pain.

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  8. OH my!! I know how you feel!! I have backtracked 3 times just this morning and all I wanted was coffee!

    Keys in the door? yep, been there done that. at the apartments! geez! here? i just forget to lock the door! i have woke up many mornings to an unlocked front door!

    i'm thinkin' old timers is setting in on me!

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  9. Oh, CHRISSY!

    BAD girl....very, very BAD!

    You must get yourself a gal-bowl...some gorgeous, mosaic bowl to ceremoniously drop your keys into when you arrive home.

    Now, write that down.

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