Don't do it, MTV!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

I'm 43 years old and I can't get enough of Jersey Shore. I think it's for the same reason that I love The Bachelor. I see myself in many of these girls who are trying so hard to be the prettiest one to get the attention of the hottest fist pumping guy. Kind of like I do now, actually, only I didn't have to wear Spanx back then.

If you aren't up to speed, Jersey Shore is the MTV reality show about a group of Guidos and Guidettes that spend the summer in Seaside Heights, New Jersey working in a T shirt shop and sharing a house.

The Guidos spend their days tanning, working out and doing laundry and their nights trying to hook up with every skank on the Shore. I know, I didn't get the laundry thing, either, but I guess Ed Hardy shirts aren't going to wash themselves.

The Guidettes just sleep all day, drink all night and suck on pickles. No really, pickles isn't "code" for co-- or anything. It's really pickles.

Apparently, when MTV had this brainstorm to produce the show, they auditioned thousands of hopefuls and threw a few hundred dollars per episode at each person they chose for the opportunity to be famous.

No one realized that it would be so popular that even people like me would forgo Masterpiece Theatre to see Mike "The Situation" take off his shirt. And what do you do with wildly popular reality shows? You keep running them over and over and over.

The seemingly simple cast may not be so dumb after all. They are negotiating the second season in "Friends" fashion, "Pay us all the same exorbitant amount or we walk!" The only thing they're forgetting is that they have no real talent, which I suppose is part of their appeal.

I, for one, say, bring in a new cast of Guidos and Guidettes and keep it fresh. Who wants to see Ronnie and Sammi in a relationship? Boorrriinng.

But, MTV, if you do decide to keep the current cast, maybe you could spice things up with an older woman as a love interest or something?

"Hey, Mike, if you show me yours, I'll show you mine."

"Will work for pickles."



  1. Aren't you happy there were no cameras when we were 22?

    Love the car-crash-have-to-look syndrome of the people.


  2. *Possible Spoiler* Didn't Ronnie and Sammi break up during the Reunion Special??

    I agree that they should get a new cast for Season 2, although it would be really tough to fill the void left by Snooki and the Situation.

  3. Some "dummies" are a lot more clever than they first appear.

  4. watch Jersey Shore? It was your dad watching that South American dating show that got you hooked on that stuff, isn't it. Isn't it?

    Masterpeice theater is Hot.

  5. @That Gal Kiki,
    Yes! We were just talking about that the other day. :-)

    Really? You think it would be hard to find a chubby little Italian girl with an eating disorder?

    Right. We're the dummies.

    I LOVE it. Mike is exactly Gene in 1997 when we met.

  6. They are negotiating?? Isn't this a reality show??

  7. Wait...So MTV doesn't play music anymore?

  8. As long as you can still picture yourself in that age category you're ahead of the rest of us. When I turned 50, it was hard to realize that the "me" that was in my brain wasn't the "me" in the mirror. Now, the GOLDEN GIRLS look young and attractive to me. *sigh*

  9. i am SO over Mike superimposing my body onto his face.

  10. I've only seen snippets of the show--but what I've seen is scary/funny. we're all giving ourselves Jersey Shore names at work.

    why not combine the Jersey Housewives with the jersey Shore--that would be f-ing awesome.

  11. @Lee the Hot Flash Queen,
    Hey, Jon & Kate set the bar pretty high.

    @Judge Fudge,
    LOL! Apparently not.

    @Funny Girl,
    Yeah. It's good, right?

    LOL! You better rethink that. Aren't two out of the three dead?

    @Joel Momberg,
    Joel! Baby! Come to Mama..

    @insomniac Ellen,
    Two fist pumps for your idea!

    I'm sucking on a pickle as we speak.

  12. Yowsa! I couldn't tell if your "fist pump" remark was a "pun intended" moment....

    So, ya wanna be a Joi-see goil???

  13. See, here's another great thing about blogging... I don't have to confess to my son-in-law that I don't know who Ronnie and Sammi are, nor do I have to ask the proverbial dumb questions about the cast and the situation. I just have to read Chrissy's blog, and I'm in the loop. Thanks, Chrissy!

  14. Best show ever on mtv! "snookin for love" is soon to come out i hear...and did u c the "before the shore special"?

  15. I keep hearing about this show, but I never looked into it. Thanks for the head up, I may have to watch it when Chris isn't around:)

  16. My daughter swears I'm missing out by not watching this. I am beginning to think maybe I am. (Oh God, I'm ashamed of what I just typed!)


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