Creative management

Sunday, February 22, 2009

And so the weekend is over and it's time for another busy week. I'm silently kicking and screaming but I know what I have to do because my parents instilled a strong work ethic into my sister and I. Well, my father did.

My mother would wait until my father left for work and then tell me to pretend I was sick so I could go shopping with her. She's really quite out of touch. She and my grandmother used to own a beauty shop (they weren't called hair salons back then) but she quit working shortly after she was married. She has no concept of bosses or timeclocks, office politics or deadlines. I guess I wish I had her world sometimes but I also think she has some regrets over chances never taken and opportunities never pursued. Even today, if I complain about an early morning meeting that I have the next day, her response is, "Then just don't go in. No one will mind. We can go shopping."

I came across this picture over the weekend of my kindergarten class. Even back then, I wasn't a morning person and was relegated to the PM session. I'm in the top row, second from the right, with my hair suggestively cascading over my non-existent bosom. That's right....a Lolita in training.

Since management is looking for creative ways of "thinking outside the box" to increase productivity while reducing expenses, this picture has inspired me to suggest splitting up staff into AM and PM roles. Each shift will start with the Pledge of Allegiance WITH "one nation under God" included.

Three hours into their shift,each person will partake in a 15 minute recess followed by a short nap. Upon awakening, they will be treated to a cup of Hi-C and some Nilla wafers to re-energize them for the rest of the day.

If anyone sasses me, they will have to sit in the corner after they write 100 times "I will not sass, Miss Starr" on the whiteboard. We don't have blackboards.

Everyone must adhere to the dress code, use proper grammar and always be on their best behavior. No one is to leave until the final bell rings.

I wonder if it's too late to become a teacher??


  1. Dear Miss Star...


    OMG...this is so funny!

    And I'm with YOU...I am so NOT an AM person. So you and I can definately be on the PM shift. And our break will consist of a glass of red wine and some nice cheese!

  2. Hi Ron,

    Your break sounds much more rejuvenating. You're on! We can drink our wine while they're all napping. :-)


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