Yeah, so what's your point?

"You have an unrealistic obsession with your dog. And you let her do whatever she wants to do."

This judgment was delivered to me by a man who made me sit on a futon on the floor of his living room so his arthritic dog could be comfortable on the couch.

But, I'm obsessed.
He was the first guy I had dated that had a dog so I pictured us taking the dogs to the dog park, having a Christmas card made of the kids at Petsmart...


And then he made that comment. I was annoyed but then I thought, maybe I am obsessed. Do I go beyond the normal need to get home after work to let her out and come home early because she's lonely all alone at home? I think dog people are a different breed anyway but don't people with pets like to pamper them? I mean, that's why you have a pet.


Unless you have fish. I don't know what's up with those people. I don't want anything as a pet that I could possibly eat. My mother was traumatized as a child when my grandfather would kill the chickens in their yard to eat. She got to experience first hand, the phrase, "running around like a chicken with their head cut off".

It's not like I'm one of those crazy dog people.

You know, the ones who dress their dogs up? Oh wait, I dress my dog up.

Or take them everywhere they go. I guess I do take her most places with me.


Or send greeting cards from the dog. Check.

Or have more pictures of their dog than their family and friends. Check, check.

Okay, so maybe I'm a little obsessed. But c'mon, I'm 42 years old and I don't have children.

And I might have Anorgasmia.

So cut me some slack.

And please, don't be jealous of our love.