Gone but not forgotten

I know I've been a total slacker lately, so first of all, I want to apologize to my bloggy friends who bestowed the following awards upon me within the last month while I was gone.

THANK YOU!

The first one comes from Tom at Sophisticated Lunacy who finds hilarity in all kinds of everyday stuff and the second one comes from Miss Nikki (which, by the way, always reminds of Prince's song, Darling Nikki) at Life's a Bitch, guaranteed to make milk come out of your nose.

Funny thing is, they're the same award.

Sort of.

They have different pictures and one is The Versatile Blogger Award and one is the Versatile Blog Award. I'm posting them twice to reflect my greatness.


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The rules are pretty much the same and since I never follow them anyway, this is what I'm going to do. I'm supposed to list 7 things about myself (so you're getting 14) and then list 15 bloggers who are deserving of being the best of the best, or something like that...

Here goes:

1. My favorite color is red. It's hot and bold and sassy! Oh, like me.

2. I curse like a sailor. FU#@ yeah, I do.

3. I'm incapable of doing math in my head. 1+1? I don't know....4?

4. I love black patent shoes. And yes, they do reflect up.

5. White cake is my favorite. There's really nothing more to say.

6. I could ice cream every day of my life. Again. Nothing.

7. I'm a sucker for a man in uniform. Or out of uniform.

8. I HATE hot weather. And everyone around me knows it.

9. I have freckles. Not in a gross way, though.

10. My hair would be completely white if I didn't color it. Found my first gray hair at 13.

11. I think air conditioning is the greatest invention ever. See #8.

12. I'm 5'9. And right now, the ideal weight for a 5'11 man.

13. I love horror movies. Pinhead rules!

14. I'm currently in a purely sexual relationship with my body pillow. Don't tell my down pillow. I don't want him to get his feathers all ruffled.

That was funny. See what I did there? Feathers. Down. Award winning humor, my friends.


I would like to pass this award(s) on to the following:

Tiffany @ Life Requires More Chocolate Anyone with a title like this is a friend of mine. And she's an Ohio girl to boot!

Cashier @ Confessions of a Cashier If you have EVER worked with the public, you must read her blog. Oh. And she's from Ohio, too!

Jessi @ Things I Use to Be. Jessi's a Chief in the Navy and my current new crush. Check out the bod she's been perfecting! Okay, she doesn't live in Ohio anymore but we won't hold that against her.

Southern Guy @ Simply Suthern Funny takes on everyday life with a southern accent. Okay, I don't KNOW that he has a southern accent but I'm assuming. Not from Ohio but there's still time.

That's my list of 15 bloggers. What? That's not 15? I told you I wasn't good at math.