Since any sort of treatment for the mass in Maddie's chest seems illogical at this point, I've decided to focus on her joint pain and how it's limiting her mobility. I've started her on new meds, continued giving her joint supplements and added in the equine/dog supplement, all in hopes that she'll maintain some degree of mobility and decrease her discomfort for whatever time she has left.
It hasn't been working.
I thought it actually was for a few days but she's really taken a turn again since Monday. Today, she couldn't even stand up. Every time I lifted her up, she would fall down again as soon as I let go. She couldn't even stand to go to the bathroom. I took this picture of her before I took the other dogs out for a walk tonight. She barely lifted her head.
If you've been following my blog for a while, you know that I totally believe in spirits and signs and Divine intervention, for lack of a better term. Well, I've got a lot going on in addition to Maddie's condition so I've been feeling completely overwhelmed and stressed. I make sure to keep lots of tissues next to the bed, in the kitchen, on the coffee table, in my car and in my pockets for the tears that I can't seem to hold back lately.
As I was out walking with the dogs tonight, I felt something brush against my leg and I figured that I had stepped on a branch or something but there was nothing there when I looked down. I shot my head around to see if someone was watching me or something because it just felt "weird."
But there was no one, so we just kept walking.
When we got home about 30 minutes later, I went into the family room where I had left Maddie but she wasn't there. I assumed that she had tried to get up and fallen down, so I looked next to the armchair but she wasn't there, either.
She wasn't in the kitchen or the dining room, both which would have been a big feat for her to get to based on the obstacles along the way; hardwood floors, crumpled rugs and chairs to walk around.
Finally, I walked into my bedroom, which is on the opposite end of the house, and there was Maddie sitting up on my bed, just looking at me like, "Hey, where ya been?"
The fact that she was in my bedroom meant that she had to walk all the way from the family room, through the dining room, down the hallway to my bedroom and then climb up four steps to get into the bed.
She. Couldn't. Even. Stand. Up!
Shit. Where's my tissue??